Still doing it ✌

​I’ve been feeling really crappy the last two weeks: sick, no appetite, starving, stuffy, etc. Which, has impacted my weight loss. I was ready to give up, AGAIN, but I’m not. Thankfully I have a second back bone (my wonderful future hubby) who helps hold me accountable when I feel like giving up. So, I’m not starting over – I’m continuing what I started and accepting that I had a bad week.

I woke up feeling defeated because my normal meal prep stuff is diminished and I can’t hit the grocery store until tomorrow. I had to step back and look at what I could use instead without making more bad choices just because my comfort choices weren’t available. I’m getting myself back into it – starting with some rereading of some always helpful Chris Powell lit,hard boiled eggs, and an Idealshape shake. 💪🍏


New month, new goal!

January I aimed to lose 12lbs. With a rocky start, and a new job that is forever passing out CAKE, I managed to lose 9 out of the 12lbs.

That 9lbs brought me below 300, so I am stoked either way!

For February, I am actually setting another goal of 12lbs!

I feel far more focused, determined, and motivated than I did a month ago.

I am going to start adding in more workouts here and there as well.

If anyone has any suggestions, let me know!



I don’t feel like making a long post…I just want to put this out there: I’m officially out of the 300’s! I weighed in at 298.8 lbs this morning. That’s 9 lbs down! I may not make my 12 lb goal for January, but I have lost 9 lbs so far, and I never want to see the 300’s ever again! 😀

Goodnight everyone!


I know I am not alone when it comes to feeling like you aren’t losing enough weight, or like you aren’t losing the weight quick enough. It can be a crippling feeling when it comes to your overall weight loss and level of motivation.

We have all seen the picture of a hand holding a pound of fat – I don’t know about all of you, but that simple picture is a constant reminder that I am doing it. It may not be the number I want to see, but I lost ONE POUND. I am one pound lighter than I was yesterday.


I lost THAT ^. To me, that’s impressive. The number may not be, but losing that chunk of fat off my body, IS. Altogether, I have lost a little over 7lbs. It may not show yet, but it will soon, and when it does, I am only going to feel better about that ONE pound I started off losing and every pound I lose thereafter.


Even when I meet my final goal, I will still have fat on my body. My goal isn’t to lose it all. My goal is to be at a healthy weight where I can feel comfortable in my own body. Don’t aim for perfection, aim for something realistic.

Aside from losing weight, I want to gain muscle. It’s important to remember that when you gain muscle, you gain weight. This is when it is essential to pay attention to your body and not the numbers on the scale. I may gain five pounds but lose 3 inches – that’s because muscle weighs more than fat. how_it_works_muscle_fat1-580x250

Stay focused. Stay positive. Stay motivated.

I may not reach my goal for January.

I still have 4.8 lbs to lose before January 31st. Incase you didn’t catch it – that’s only 4 days away, counting today. Possible? Sure. Realistic? Maybe not.

Nonetheless, I have not gained and I am not stuck where I started. I have loss weight. I have not given up, and February will only be better.

I will make a Febraury goal on January 31st.

I will also post new pictures after every 20lb loss.

Any suggestions?

What’s your goal?





Disclaimer: pictures taken from google – not mine!



Pick it up.

Last week wasn’t great.

I’m up two pounds, so I still have 7lbs to lose for January.

The plus side?

Normally I would completely fall of track, give up, and stop caring altogether for a little while. Not this time. I have learned – over a very, very long period of time – that I am going to have days, sometimes more than one at a time, where I do mess up; but it is not reason to quit. Yes, I gained two pounds. Yes, it totally sucks. Yes, I could have made better choices.

Guess what? I didn’t.

That just means I have to work harder today, tomorrow and the next day.

Which is exactly what I plan to do!


Who else is trying to lose a substantial amount of weight?

What changes are you making in your day to day life?

What motivates you?

I want to hear about other peoples goals, too!

More than a picture. 

These are all me. Different sizes, different attitude and different phases of life. I can look at the pictures from my last post and feel bad for myself, but what good would that do? 

Instead, I choose to look at all of the pictures. The big, the little and the new. 

I see these and I see someone who is capable of change. I see someone who has changed so many times before and someone who can do whatever she decides. 

I see hope and motivation. 

First Photo! 

As promised…I took THE pictures. 


I felt so uncomfortable and exposed, but I needed to take these.

I started at 307 lbs this month. My goal is to lose 12lbs in January. So far, I have lost 7lbs and it’s only half way through January. 

I have only changed my eating habits. I have not yet added in regular workouts, and I’m still seeing weight fall off. 

My next set of photos will hopefully show some progress! 


In light of being serious about losing weight – I have agreed to be 100% transparent. No more hiding my bad choices, my mistakes, my struggles, my failures, or my embarrassments.

Today has been fairly bad. Not in an “it’s just been a shitty day” kind of sense, but in regards to decisions.

I lost four pounds last week. If I’d said that before, I would have felt like it wasn’t enough. Now, I see that as an awesome step in the right direction and something to be proud of.

Right now though, I feel like crap. Instead of eating my healthy breakfast, I decided to munch on some yummy Honey O’s – which are delicious, but not a good choice. Instead of my healthy lunch, I decided to get chicken and fried rice from the cafeteria at my job – I didn’t even eat half of it, but enough to make it a bad choice. Instead of eating my healthy snack, I decided to accept the Pepsi and Snickers that were given to me by my co-worker – I took a few sips of Pepsi and threw it out, but it wasn’t even worth the few sips.

I use to ignore these choices. I wouldn’t log them in my food diary because I was embarrassed. I wouldn’t even talk to my man about the things I ate because I knew they weren’t great. That didn’t help me. It hindered me.

It’s so important to be honest with yourself about your choices – good or bad. NOT EVERYDAY WILL BE PERFECT. Not every choice will be the right one. YOU WILL MAKE MISTAKES, but you will also learn from them. I’m slowly learning that and the more I choose to be transparent about all of it, the easier it will become to say no to the bad choices.

As I said before, having a positive support system is vital. It’s so easy to beat yourself up sometimes, and having someone to remind you that you are doing well, even if you made a mistake, makes it a hell of a lot easier to do better the next day instead of falling off your journey altogether..

Today wasn’t perfect. I own that. I feel the effects of those choices and I know tomorrow will be a better day.

The Beginning of the End.

Today is January 8th, 2017.

I weighted myself less than a week ago (January 3rd) and I found myself completely miserable with what I saw. I was 307 lbs of unhappy. 307 POUNDS. Talk about a breaking point. I had sworn time and time again, that I would never let myself get into the 300’s and then I find myself right where I didn’t want to be.

It’s easy to look from the outside and wonder why anyone would LET themselves get to such an unhealthy point. I know, I use to be one of those people. Now, I know how easy it is to NOT even know that you’re near that point, until you are already there.

I didn’t think I was there. I thought I was doing alright. I thought I was making better choices and on the right track. Obviously, I was missing something. I wasn’t seeing some of the choices I made the way those around me were seeing them. I didn’t think eating that piece of cake, or that bowl of ice cream was going to be an issue later. I just knew my other choices were better. The thing is, how much better can the other choices be, if the rest of my choices are still hindering?

Apparently pretty damn detrimental. Now I am stuck with this weight, this body, and this mindset. THIS ADDICTION.

How many addicts do you know, who think they are fine? I don’t know any who readily know they have an issue. I don’t know any who think they need immediate intervention. I am no different. I am not addicted to eating. I am not someone who needs to be eating all day long or craves food. However, I am addicted to making unhealthy choices. When I do eat, I don’t make the best choices. I figure, I don’t eat a lot, so I can eat things a little less healthy. Uhhmmmm, IT DOESN’T WORK THAT WAY.

I didn’t even begin to own this addiction, this issue, until a couple nights ago. I was grocery shopping with my man and I wanted to buy M&Ms and marshmallows. Of course, I justified each as a “healthier choice” than eating a candy bar of bag of chips. He immediately shut me down. Reminded me that they aren’t good choices. Reminded me of my goal. Reminded me of the changes I  NEEDED to make to finally be where I want to be. I GOT MAD. I wouldn’t talk to him. I didn’t like him. He reminded me that I asked him to help, even if I got mad and that’s exactly what he did. An hour later, we talked about it. I cried. I admitted I had a problem with certain food options and I needed help. The next day, I THANKED HIM. He was right and I couldn’t be more thankful to have a partner who is willing to hold me accountable even if it temporarily hurts my feelings.

With that said, it is so important to have people in your corner. People to remind you what you’re working so hard for, in those moments that you simply don’t care to remember for yourself. People who can hold you up when your goals feel impossible. People who believe in you when you show little faith in yourself.

I have those people.

With his help, I have created my first goal.

I have cut out all liquids, except for water (I usually add lemon slices, strawberries, or even pineapple). If we go out, I will allow myself one drink that isn’t water (we don’t go out often). I eat throughout the day – every two to three hours and I do my absolute best to restrain from any bad decisions.

With these little changes, my first small goal is to lose at least 8 more lbs by January 31st. That’s 12 lbs in January.

Starting photos, coming soon!